Dead Babies

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=110 BGCOLOR="#CCFFFF" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="03c506e1egerbq.jpg"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#339900" FACE="Arial" ><B>        ~!*Welcome to My Humble Abode  *!~        </B></FONT><B> </B><B> </B><B> </B><B> </B><B> </B><B>|    </B><B> </B><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE=" !Welcome to My Humble Abode ! 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</div> <div> A1: Baby in a cellophane bag.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: What is worse than being under a pile of dead babies?</div> <div> A: Having to eat your way out</div> <bR> <div> Q: How do you make a baby float? </div> <div> A1: One glass of Root Beer and two scoops of baby.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> A2: Take your foot off its head.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: What's red, bubbly, and scratches at the window?</div> <div>  A: A baby in the microwave. </div> <bR> <div> Q: How do you get a baby in a cup?</div> <div> A: Blender...</div> <div> Q: How do you get the baby out?</div> <div> A: Straw...</div> <bR> <div> Q: What is easier to unload, a truck full of babies or a truck full of bowling balls? </div> <div> A: Babies, because you can use a pitchfork<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> Q: How do you know when you hit a live one? </div> <div> A: The pitchfork shakes<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: What is worse than that?<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> A: At the bottom of the pile, there was one trying to eat its way out<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: What is worse than that?<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> A: It made it<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: What is worse than that?<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> A: It went back for seconds.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q2: What's small, red and can't get into elevators? </div> <div> A: A baby with a javelin through its head.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> Q: What's red, sits in the front of mirror, and gets smaller and smaller? </div> <div> A: A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: Whats red and white and screams?<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> A: A peeled baby in a bag of salt.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#000000" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> Q: What's red and white and is spread all over the lawn? </div> <div> A: A baby run over by a lawn mower.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: What's red, white and green and is spread all over the lawn?<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> A: Same baby, two months later.<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <div> A woman was lying in her hospital bed recuperating after an intense 12 hour delivery of a bouncing baby boy. </div> <bR> <div> Moments later the hospital room door opened, and in walked the delivery nurse carrying the baby boy ....<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> SUDDENLY the nurse THROWS the baby on the floor, kicks it up against the wall, picks it up and TWIRLS it around several times and THROWS it against the wall....<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> The woman gives out a loud SHREEEK and hollers MY GOD ..... WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY BABY ??????<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#0000FF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> The Nurse chuckles a little to herself 'April Fools', she says... He was ALREADY DEAD .........<FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#FF0000" FACE="Arial" > </FONT></div> <bR> <div> Q: Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? </div> <div> A: Because it was dead. <-- funny withought the other follow up jokes</div> <div>  Q: Why did the baby fall out of the tree? </div> <div> A: Because it was stapled to the koala.</div> <div>  Q: Why did the tree fall over? </div> <div> A: The koala never let go. </div> <div> Q: Why did the kangaroo die? </div> <div> A: Because the koala landed on it. </div> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>